Stupid pop-ups...

I'm sick of these shitty things that pop-up every now and then... "JASON STATHAM REVEALS HIS SECRETS ON HOW HE GOT IN SHAPE TO LOOK LIKE A TANK", there's loads of other ones too: The Rock, Vin Diesel, the list goes on. I haven't bothered reading them cuz, let's face it, I ain't gonna look right if I had that body. ANYWAYS, my main point is that them posts are usually viruses and people need to stop clicking on them links. I tell you what, I'll make it easier for you and tell you exactly how to get that body.

1. Eat healthy (no fun there)

2. Join the gym (RIP money)

3. Quit masturbating (good luck, pal) 

4. Or you can just take steroids and possibly become a wife-beater. (Sounds appealing, right?)

There you have it. Fuck yeah...

Peace. ✌🏾️

"Momma, why you crazy?"

 My mother has been yelling at me to get ready so we can head out for a while now. So, I decided I'd be a good boy and speed my game up and actually get in the shower first. A little while went by and  I was lovin the comfort of the warm water... UNTIL MY MOTHER DECIDES TO WASH THE DISHES... The walls are so thin you can literally hear the pipes running to the taps in the kitchen.  A second after I decide to scream my lungs out telling her to stop her silly kitchen shenanigans... She had the nerve to say "I'm not even using the tap." WELL, THEN, DO YOU WANNA EXPLAIN THESE 3RD DEGREE BURNS ALL DOWN MY BACK!? Halloween isn't until October and my back looks like Freddy Krueger's wrinkly ball sack.